Dirty Ice Cream

  Please stay turned, I will continue to write, but this is my life, 24/7.

I  wonder what will become… Telling the story is indifferent. I mean, it can be summed up in one sentence. Understanding the sentence is another thing. “My Dominate Lover, is my Boss.” Lately I think more about how I got here. My career, the polyamourse lifestyle we enjoy. Our new found reationship with E. The relationships we have with others. His wife. No one can teach you to be a Mistress, you can care about someone enough to encourage them to be one, but for the definition it is seldom used in the US unless you are in a relationship with a married man. Mistress with the sexual definition twist, well thats something someone falls into, and Love, Lies and Submissions are usally the culprits. 

Love, I will start with love and end with love. Never believe love is deifned. Its a feeling of emotions whiping through someone body. We fall into types of love with everything. It is a pleasure humans desire. We yern for it. How we are taught to love matters. Who, What and Why we love makes a difference. The time we share loving something or someone is challenging. Pain is surly going to happen over and over again when we do love.  To find ways to cope through the pain is a root to making love more successful. 

Posted in DD.

Polyamorous Folk “VS” Open Marriages/Relationships

Over the past few years, polyamory has become a more widely known term and practice. And perhaps inevitably, certain misconceptions and misunderstandings about what “polyamory” means have become widespread as well. It would be unfortunately difficult to say which among these misunderstandings is the most common, or the most hurtful to polyamorous folks. But there’s one in particular that I’d like to discuss: the idea that “polyamory” means “committed couple who have casual partners on the side.”
There has been much talk about “open marriage” and “open relationships” in recent years, with some even paradoxically dubbing non-monogamy “the new monogamy.” In this open-marriage conception of non-monogamous relationships, there is still a central, committed (often legally married) couple, who allow one another to engage in purely sexual (or at least quite casual) outside relationships. Generally, any discussion about the benefits of such practice revolves around how it strengthens and/or reinvigorates the central couple in question. I want to be perfectly clear that I don’t see anything wrong with strictly sexual non-monogamy so long as it’s genuinely fulfilling and consensual for all involved, including the outside partners. But for those of us living in polyamorous families, it can be incredibly frustrating when people use those concepts of open marriage to make assumptions about the structure of our relationships.

Because we live in such a monogamy-centered society, it makes sense that many people can only conceive of non-monogamy in what ultimately still amounts to monogamous terms. There is a common misconception that a polyamorous relationship is really no different from an open-relationship agreement: one committed couple, with some lighthearted fun on the side. But the word “polyamory,” by definition, means loving more than one. Many of us have deeply committed relationships with more than one partner, with no hierarchy among them and no core “couple” at the heart of it all. To me, this notion that there must be one more important relationship, one true love, feels a lot like people looking at same-sex couples and thinking that one person must be the “man” in the relationship and the other must be the “woman.” After all, both of these misunderstandings result from people trying to graft their normative conceptions of love and relationships onto people who are partnering in non-normative ways. It seems that it is somewhat easy for many people to acknowledge that humans are capable of loving one person and still enjoying sex with others (assuming, of course, that the terms of their relationship make such behavior acceptable). But it is much harder for people to think outside the fairy-tale notion of “the one” and imagine that it might be possible to actually romantically love more than one person simultaneously.

The unfortunate result of this is that, for those of us in more than one serious and meaningful relationship, the world around us insists on viewing one of those relationships as less valid than the other, especially when one relationship happens to predate others. I have been with my husband for 17 years, legally married for 11. But I am also deeply in love with and committed to my boyfriend of two and a half years, and it hurts that people make assumptions about that relationship simply being something frivolous and recreational outside my marriage.

Another side effect of this misunderstanding is that people often wonder why we poly people need to talk openly about “what happens behind closed doors.” I have heard many times that there should be no reason to disclose one’s polyamorous relationships with parents, children, or the neighbors. That might seem logical if what we’re talking about is strictly extramarital sexual partners. But my life with my partners isn’t reducible to “what happens behind closed doors” any more than any serious, long-term relationship is. We share a home and a life; we are a family. Openly, publicly acknowledging my boyfriend as my partner is not just saying that we have sex. It’s saying that, like my husband, he is my partner in every sense of the word. He loves me and supports me and respects me. He sees me at my worst and still wants to spend his life with me anyway. It would be unimaginable to me to hide the nature of our relationship, to pretend that he is merely a friend or roommate, to not have him by my side at weddings and funerals and family holiday gatherings. But this is exactly what people are expecting of me when they ask why I feel the need to be so “open” about my “private business.”

Not all polyamorous people have multiple equally committed relationships, and many do designate a more central (typically live-in) relationship as “primary.” But my partners and I are hardly unusual among polyamorous folks. Many share homes in configurations like ours, or as committed triads or quads or complex networks of five or more. Many have deep and lasting relationships with no cohabitation at all. To project traditional conceptions of love and commitment onto these relationships, to view them only as a slight variation on monogamy, is to deny all of the many varied ways that polyamorous people form relationships and families.

If you have polyamorous friends, relatives, or acquaintances, please don’t make assumptions about their lives based on what you think all non-monogamous configurations look like. Let them tell you how they define their relationships. And if they identify multiple people as their partners, don’t try to read into who is more important than whom, imagining hierarchies even if you’re told there are none. Though it might not fit with how you conceptualize love, offer polyamorous relationships the same validation that you would offer any other. And remember what a common human thing it is to want to be able to tell the world — and not be told by the world — whom we love.

Posted in DD.

A wise Mistress is the best Mistress. Mistress Gone Mad.

A Mistress who becomes a wife, leaves a vacancy. – Never forget that as hard as it is to swallow.
What would you do if suddenly the man you had been seeing, who is married decides to leave his wife? Would you run away or would you embrace it?

Lets talk about the reasons why it’s a bad idea…

A wise mistress is the best kind of mistress. One that can have fun and not get her heart broken.

When a relationship begins between a woman and a man who is married ground rules need to set, you need to make sure you are both on the same page. He may tell you he is unhappy with his marriage, that he is in the process of divorce but chances are he is only saying that to keep you around, to make you think you have some kind of “chance” with him. Don’t make the mistake of believing it, you will only get your heart broken in the end. There is only a 1% chance that would actually leave his wife anyway. If he truly wanted to be with you and only you he would be divorced, he wouldn’t still be hanging on to his wife

Being a mistress, you get to have all the fun, you get as much hot sex as you want, you feel sexy and wanted. You get dined and treated like a queen. He may even buy you expensive gifts and take you shopping or take you on expensive vacations during his “business trips.” These are all things that chances are his wife doesn’t experience. His marriage with his wife was probably at one point exciting, but over time all relationships deteriorate, it never lasts. Chances are while you are being wined and dined she is sitting at home cleaning poopy diapers and folding his underwear. What a life huh? She has to deal with him when he is in a bad mood, clean up after him, do his laundry, basically all of the unfun things a relationship entails. Your his escape from reality, your what he looks forward to in his life. Your his fantasy and that’s why he picked you. It’s like the perfect relationship. No responsibility and basically all fun and games.

Having an affair with a married man is not something that really anyone considers acceptable, it is important to keep the relationship essentially meaningless because people will look down on you and think of you as a whore and a home wrecker if the relationship goes beyond just an affair, even though it takes two to tango most people will look down on your more than him. As a mistress you are enabling him to cheat on his wife and people will hate you for that, and not only his wife.

At the beginning of an affair rules must be set and respected and if either person strays from those boundaries, the affair should be ended immediately. A mistress never expects commitment from her married man. That is not your place. If you want a boyfriend than go ahead and get one, you have no place destroying other people’s lives especially young children. When you choose a married man you want to pick one that will make you feel great, that makes you laugh and someone you have fun with and of course someone who is great in bed and makes you feel great. You do not want to pick a guy who will try and make you fall in love with him. Your time spent with him will be limited, he has a family that he will go back to and spend the majority of his time with especially if he has children. Jealousy will nearly kill you if you let yourself get attached to this guy and count the minutes till you get to see him again, or get upset that he doesn’t call you/contact you. He isn’t going to sometimes, you are #2 and that is something you need to accept if you want to be a mistress.

A mistress should always keep her own life busy, Try to keep from talking about your own life issues or long explanations about why you can’t meet him. The less he knows about your life without him the better. He is not a part of your reality, he is the fun that you sometimes get to have.

Every date you have with your married man should be like a first date. You should always look amazing, hair done nice, make-up, jewelery, clothing that compliments you and is sexy, sexy bra and panties, nice shoes. Your nails and toe nails should always be done nicely and you should always smell amazing. I also go tanning but that is up to you. Remember, if he wanted a girl who hangs out in granny panties, he’d go home to his wife, not hang out with you. Your job is to keep him wanting you, needing you. You will get a lot more out of your affair with your married man if you do this. Never allow yourself to be too comfortable with him. You should always have a good attitude, be funny, sweet, sexy, you should NEVER complain or whine about anything, that’s what your girlfriends are for and chances are his wife is doing plenty of nagging and the last thing you want to do is to start acting like her.

Keeping the affair discreet is extremely important. He needs to trust you and you will not be doing anything good for either of you by trying to bring the affair to light. Both him and his wife will hate you for it, not to mention chances are you will look like a whore to everyone you and him know. If you want to continue having a good time with him you have to be discreet. Never call him, wait till he calls you. If you see him in public, don’t even look at him. Never ever show up at his work or anywhere else in a public place unless it’s in a town far enough away from where he lives and even then there is a chance someone might spot you. You can never leave your guard down. The moment he is caught he will most likely try to work it out with his wife and leave you in the dust.
Here is some simple etiquette for mistresses-

1. If he tells you he loves you, he is lying. Remember, your with a man who lies to his wife ever day. He is a good liar.

2. You should be ready to give up all holidays. Those are reserved for his wife and kids. Prepare yourself to not even hear from him on valentines day, christmas, your birthday, any important holidays.

3. Don’t complain/put down his wife. It makes your look petty and it’s just not classy or sexy. He does not want to hear about his wife while he is with you.

4. DO NOT CALL HIM, WAIT FOR HIM TO CALL YOU!! This includes txting.

5. Don’t ask him for money, he will then feel like you need him and you don’t want him to think you need him. If he buys you nice gifts that is fine, they are just that gifts. You are not a prostitute, don’t expect money

6. Mistresses never complain, he gets enough of that from his wife and it’s a huge turn off

7. Always have more than one married man. If one leaves its easier to get over it when you still have someone else. It helps the heartache.

8. He should pay for everything in cash as to not leave evidence behind for his wife to find- remind him of this.

9. Never let him see you cry. You don’t want him to see you as a vulnerable person and he gets enough whiny tears from his wife. You are supposed to be making him happy not guilty.

10. If his wife starts getting suspicious, get out while you still can. Resist the urge to stay around, it’s only going to get ugly and you don’t want to be around for it.

11. Don’t think too much- Just enjoy the moments of happiness you have with him. Live for the moment while your with him, never think about him in the future because chances are he won’t be there in the future. Just cherish those moments you do have with him.

12. You never want to be #1, so don’t allow yourself to think one day he will be “your man.”

One should always be in love. That is the reason why one should never marry. – Oscar Wilde

Posted in DD.

danny danced in frustration 

 LI and James were waiting for the bell to ring at exactly 9pm.

To pass the time, they played Daddy / daughter on the sofa. Daddy wore a shirt and pants. He tore off all of LI’s clothes. She knew it meant a thrashing and more, so she resisted strenuously. It was futile: in 2 minutes LI was naked as a baby and over his knee. “Why, Daddy?” pled LI. “Because it makes us horny. Just a warm-up, love. We’ll have more fun with danny in 20 minutes. Push it up, please. You can use your vibrator, but don’t come yet.”

Daddy spanked LI’s sit-spots and fingered her puss between strokes until she wiggled and wanted to come.

“Ok, honey, sit on the sofa and rest while I strip. I want to see you give danny a good thrashing.” He undressed, and put LI’s hand round his hard cock. LI was giving Daddy a slow handjob, when he caught sight of danny looking in the window. He did not say what he had seen. “Mouth. Deep in, honey. Right in.

The bell rang. James pulled out and they put on their bathrobes. “Get it, please, honey.”

Danny appeared looking shame-faced. LI instructed “Strip so I can thrash you naked.” He complied, his cock already rising. She tied him face-down on the bench, dropped her robe and took the tawse from James. Danny wriggled as LI stood to let danny see her naked. She ran the tawse through her hands and moved to danny’s left. LI raised the tawse and lashed his ass 6 times. Danny bucked and sobbed. James said “ He was spying on us through the window.” “Oh, you like watching, do you?” said LI, rhetorically. I’m going to blow James. Want to watch, you worm?”

She untied danny and hoisted him to stand under the hanging rings where she tied his wrists to them. His cock was flaccid. LI strapped on the metal cock-cage, and then shoved the butt plug into his ass. Danny danced in frustration, his cock straining. She stood to show off her body. “I’ll be back, worm. Like what you see? Cock straining to rise, is it?”

James watched LI’s actions with excitement. She knelt between his legs and wanked his tumescent cock. “In deep, honey. All the way.” LI could see danny struggle to contain himself. She took James’s cock deep in her throat, bobbing her head. James came, spurting down LI’s throat. They relaxed on the sofa, watching danny’s discomfort James stroking LI’s pussy.

Regards

Posted in DD.

Mustang and Motorcycles

Life has been so busy. Promise I am going to get more active on posting.

My summer will be full of Mustangs and Motorcycles.. 

Hopfully with some added BDSM fun. Mixing all three of them is always fun.

Posted in DD.